[The headpat ends up tapping into memories long past, of an older brother holding his baby sister close through a chilly fall evening, patting her head as she shivers under both her coat and blanket. 'It's alright. We'll be alright.'
How long has it been since someone actually comforted her like that? When did she learn how to keep smiling so people wouldn't worry about her?]
It's fine. It's- it's all fine. That's what we're here to change, right?
[There's an uncomfortable truth about Tuuri's situation that's still gnawing at her, deep in her chest-
Even if you win and go back, what situation are you going back into?
-but it hasn't consumed her yet. She can still smile and act like she's alright.]
[Lavi knows a thing or two about smiles. He has one for every occasion, all of them similarly distasteful, every one a different fabrication. He knows the kind of smiles that hide and the ones that lie, and the ones that are meant to comfort anyone else but them.]
...We can still change it, but that doesn't mean it didn't happen.
[Or maybe they'll forget, once they go back. If they go back. Fate isn't set in stone, huh? But what would change if Lavi went back?
His hand moves gently, not so much a pet as it is a stroke.]
You've got the scars, Tuuri. They're a part of you, and that's not a bad thing. Just makes up who you are, yeah?
[They're a part of her, huh? She can't help but wonder what everyone will think when they see those scars on her shoulder.
She can tell Laviis trying to make her feel better though, and she appreciates it. Almost as much as she appreciates that headpat. So with a sigh, she leans over a little bit, to thunk her head against Lavi's shoulder. He started it, so it's fine to be a little vulnerable.]
What they represent has been my worst fear for my entire life. I was always told 'don't go outside the safe areas, don't go anywhere dangerous, save that work for the immune people, you have your place here.' I don't regret going out into the Silent World, I knew the risks when I signed up to go. But it's still frightening.
Your worst fears were realized. You died the way people have been saying could happen your entire life. And now you're here, in this place that's constantly reminding us that we're dead.
[She has to keep telling herself that, or else the weight of everything will drag her down.]
Some trolls have been stuck as trolls for ninety years now. And we were well out into the Silent World on our mission. If I had turned instead of being killed, I could have suffered out there for centuries before someone found me and put me out of my misery. This is honestly a better outcome.
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no subject
How long has it been since someone actually comforted her like that? When did she learn how to keep smiling so people wouldn't worry about her?]
It's fine. It's- it's all fine. That's what we're here to change, right?
[There's an uncomfortable truth about Tuuri's situation that's still gnawing at her, deep in her chest-
Even if you win and go back, what situation are you going back into?
-but it hasn't consumed her yet. She can still smile and act like she's alright.]
That fate isn't set in stone, so it's alright.
no subject
...We can still change it, but that doesn't mean it didn't happen.
[Or maybe they'll forget, once they go back. If they go back. Fate isn't set in stone, huh? But what would change if Lavi went back?
His hand moves gently, not so much a pet as it is a stroke.]
You've got the scars, Tuuri. They're a part of you, and that's not a bad thing. Just makes up who you are, yeah?
no subject
She can tell Laviis trying to make her feel better though, and she appreciates it. Almost as much as she appreciates that headpat. So with a sigh, she leans over a little bit, to thunk her head against Lavi's shoulder. He started it, so it's fine to be a little vulnerable.]
What they represent has been my worst fear for my entire life. I was always told 'don't go outside the safe areas, don't go anywhere dangerous, save that work for the immune people, you have your place here.' I don't regret going out into the Silent World, I knew the risks when I signed up to go. But it's still frightening.
no subject
[there's fear, and there's also Trauma?]
Your worst fears were realized. You died the way people have been saying could happen your entire life. And now you're here, in this place that's constantly reminding us that we're dead.
no subject
[She has to keep telling herself that, or else the weight of everything will drag her down.]
Some trolls have been stuck as trolls for ninety years now. And we were well out into the Silent World on our mission. If I had turned instead of being killed, I could have suffered out there for centuries before someone found me and put me out of my misery. This is honestly a better outcome.